Saturday, October 1, 2011

The Best of Ask Eddi - Am I a Second Life Transvestite?

This advice column ran in Eddi Haskell's Second Life in 2009

Our advice column for today comes from a concerned reader in Ypsilanti, Michigan.

Dear Eddi:

Please help me.  You see, I am worried that Second Life has exposed my inner self as a transvestite. For all my life, I have been what many consider to be a man's man. I hate shopping. I love the NFL. I hate crudites and humus dip.  I love steak and pizza. I hope you can get the picture. 

One month ago, as a joke, I created a female alt on Second Life with the help of a friend of mine, another guy, who had made one as a novelty item. Now, when I first made "Noreen" which is not her real  name, I laughed my head off.  There were jiggling emerald boobs, there was the cute face that came with the premium shape I got, it was all very nice but funny.  When my friend suggested I go to Excte and get a starter "lady" sex pack, so he could break me in, I threatened to punch his head out in real life. No one is getting near Noreen's honey trap!

But, something happened when I passed my first lovely dress shop as Noreen.  I found that I could not fight an uncontrollable urge to buy this saucy little red minidress with these hot leather boots. So I bought "Noreen" one outfit. And then another.  In my first day of buying clothes, I ended up spending L$22,000 on hot little outfits for my new avatar. 

It has not stopped there.  I now am spending even more time as Noreen, and am entering all the high end shops to buy clothes and shoes.  I just dropped L$14,000 at Zhoa on various  pumps.  In the past three weeks, I have spent over $78,000 on clothes and hair for "Noreen".  And I have to admit, I do look stunning in all my new get ups!

So Eddi, am I a transvestite?   How can I stop?   What advice can you give me?

Dear Concerned Reader:

Just because you enjoy dressing "Noreen" up to the nines does not mean that you will be a real life transvestite. For one thing, large sized steak and potato mid-American men, which I assume you are, simply cannot find the fashion that being a high end tranny requires, since they do not make outfits for the "larger" real life woman that are saucy and chic in size 60. For another, all these clothes would cost many thousands to buy in real life. Unless you feel an uncontrollable urge to buy a bra and fishnet panties, and wear them to the office, I would not worry about being a real life tranny.

However, you most certainly are a Second Life tranny.  You have the "itch", and I believe you should continue down this road as your income can afford. Come up with a hot stage name like "Stella Doro" or "Connie Classless" and perform at gay clubs.  You will be a hoot and make money to to pay for all your new outfits. However, once you start going to your local seamstress to see if you yourself can wear a matching outfit with "Noreen" as you play Second Life, you have a whole new set of issues to deal with, and professional help is required.

Good luck accessorizing in Second Life!   You will need it so you can play mix and match more effectively!

For help with your Second Life problems please send Eddi an email at, or leave him a note card inworld. 

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