Saturday, June 5, 2010

Ask Eddi - How Do I Deal with Cold Callers?

This comes from a reader in the U.K.

Dear Eddi:

How do you deal with cold calling? One way I deal with it is that I ask if I can get a pen, and then leave the phone on the side. I do pick up 15 minutes later to see if they are still there.

My Answer:

Dear Concerned Reader:

I love telemarketing calls! they are such fun.

One of my favorite things to do is refer to any man as madame. When he insists he is a male, I say that he sure doesn't sound like one. I also ask if he is gay, and if he is not, suggest many ways in which we can both try experimentation to bring him out of the closet as a submissive bottom.

If the caller is female, I start talking very slow and saying things like --what shoes are you wearing? Are they red? I really like shoes. Red shoes.

I then start breathing heavy, very slowly, and say tell me more about your shoes. I LOVE shoes. I want to see you in shoes. and then i repeat the word red over and over.

Never fails to lighten up an afternoon!

1 comment:

  1. Eddi, you are a disturbed individual! LMAO Funny, but disturbed.


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